Exhumation

“Then he who had received the one talent came and said…I was afraid, and went and hid your talent in the ground.” Matthew 25:24-25 NKJV

ex’ hu·ma’tion  n. 1. To remove from a grave; disinter.

        2. To bring to light, especially after a period of obscurity.

I tried to come up with a clever analogy that would help me describe the way I have been feeling lately, but I just couldn’t come up with anything. Just as I was about to give up, I was reminded of the parable Jesus told His disciples about a wealthy man who distributed his wealth among three of his servants and left them to do whatever they pleased with what was given. Each servant was given a different number of “talents.” When the man returned to see how the servants had used their talents, only two out of the three had done anything at all. The third servant, who was only given one talent, claimed to have been too “afraid and went and hid [the] talent in the ground.” When the man heard this, he rebuked his servant and cast him away.

Although this parable has been preached from so many different angles before, it spoke to me in a way so unique that I pray it won’t earn me a personal rebuke from my pastor, lol. But to put it plainly, this pretty much sums up how I have been feeling for the last few years: I am sick of being afraid.  I am tired of letting my fear or feelings of inadequacy keep me from experiencing the fullness of life…from enabling me to express myself…from trying new things…from being 100% ME.

I don’t know about you, but self-doubt has always equaled self-sabotage in my life. Whenever the opportunity arises for me to step out of my comfort zone, I immediately shrink back from the opportunity faster than a turtle seeks shelter within its hardened shell. This may sound dramatic, but it’s so true. And it never fails that every time I “punk out,” I end up kicking myself later because deep down inside I know I can do it. Whatever it is…not because of who I am in my own strength, but because of who I am in Christ. I don’t know if any of you can relate to this, but I don’t want to wallow in self-doubt anymore. I am studying a book right now that is literally changing my life (So Long, Insecurity by Beth Moore), and it taught me something very important about myself: [When I] lack security, I also lack faith. I don’t just doubt myself, I also doubt God about myself.

I guess you’re wondering by now what any of this has to do with the parable I mentioned earlier. Well, it’s simple: God has given me access to all of His “wealth” through Christ. His wealth encompasses a multitude of things: my gifts, talents and abilities; His love, grace and forgiveness; His favor which allows me to overcome adversity; His peace, power…He even gives me a little faith. The list goes on…but what do I usually do with all of this wealth? In so many ways, I am just like that fearful servant who buries these gifts in the dirt so that no one can see them or make me use them. Thoughts like, “I am not as talented as that person” or “What if people don’t like what I have to say?” or “What if I fail?” race through my mind and stop me dead in my tracks.

Overtime, I’ve learned that my own spiritual and personal growth are not the only casualties in this war within my mind. It also prevents God from using me to bless other people. We would be surprised by how God can use our faith to bless someone else. You don’t know how your demonstration of faith can encourage a younger generation to trust God and to believe in themselves. And it’s not about being the greatest at something or always succeeding. Failure can inspire faith too. People need to see that our “greatness” comes from our relationship with Christ. Paul said he could “do ALL things through Christ who strengthens [me]” (Philippians 4:13). He could have stopped at he can do all things, but he knew that his abilities did not come from himself and he fearlessly spent the latter part of his life showing others how to tap into that same power. God says in His word that He has “not given us a spirit of fear; but of power, love and a sound mind (2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV). This means fear can only come from one other source. Satan uses our fears to keep us from experiencing God’s infinite power. He knows how dangerous we can be if we fully rely on God for our strength and self-worth. Now that we know at least one of our enemy’s primary tactics, let’s stop giving him that foothold in our lives. I am learning each day that everything God has given me are beautiful tools to be used for His purpose and there is no reason to walk in fear of using them. As you and I continue on this spiritual journey together, let’s remember to use those gifts boldly…God wants us to share those gifts with the world so that they may come to experience Him for themselves…If you’re like me, then it’s time to get out our spiritual shovels and retrieve those gifts from their hiding places.

Memory Verse: Psalm 27:1-2

“The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?”