New Life Resolution

At the end of every year, most people find themselves replaying scenes from the previous 12 months in their minds. Some

images make us cringe while others inspire us to keep pushing in the right direction. For some of us who cringe over the mistakes, mishaps, and failures of the past, we often find ourselves jotting down a list of temporal "resolutions" that we will attempt to magically fix all by ourselves at the stroke of midnight on January 1st, only to find ourselves back at our bad habits by January 2nd. I don't know your story, but that is definitely mine. 

Through my writing and so many other things that have occurred recently, I have gained a lot of insight and decided to abandon this mystical New Year's Resolution stuff. I came to the conclusion the other day that something has got to give. I need permanent change, not a brief pause in my regularly scheduled program. I need a lifestyle change. I also realize that I can't expect my issues to dissipate on their own, as I remain the same person I was in 2013. I have to do something new in order to see new results. 2013 has been pretty good to me. I say that because God has used a lot of good and bad things to show me His power, His love and His direction in my life. As I began to reflect on what He has done for me, I was encouraged to jot down my own list of things that I must do if I wish to have the abundant life The Lord has promised (John 10:10). A lot of times, we read that scripture and think of God as a genie who just gives us everything we want without us lifting a finger, but we are so wrong (that's a different blog for another time). Becoming better takes some work on our end...

 As you read my list, I want to encourage you to ponder the things you want to do differently going forward. Feel free to share them with me as we attempt to become better versions of ourselves together. I also have a favor to ask of you. After reading this, I ask that you would hold me accountable. The truth is that I can't do this on my own. Trust me, I know. I need someone to remind me of my goal every step of the way because I'm human and life happens. I promise to hold you accountable as well...

              My New Life Resolution 

1. No more negative thoughts or speech: negativity only serves to either hold me back or make me feel worse about things I cannot change.

2. Uplift and empower the women around me: This year I discovered that too many females (young and old) suffer from low self-esteem. A lot of the poor decisions we make stem from some deep-rooted hurt that has never been fully addressed. I can attest personally to that. I don't want to be a part of the problem so I vow to be more of an encourager instead of tearing others down to boost my own self-worth.

3. Stop lying: Believe and speak the truth at all times, whether it's comfortable or not. Lies have caused a great deal of pain in my life and I no longer want any part of it. 

4. No more fear: I am fully committed to believing in the person God called me to be. Instead of living in fear, I intend to bask in the love, power and self-control that God has given me. (2Timothy 1:7)

5. No more people-pleasing: Trying to please everyone is not only impossible; it's exhausting! From now on, I will do things based on what is right, not what is popular.

6. Forgive and move on: I've held onto a lot of pain caused by other people, but I'm only hurting myself when I don't forgive. While it is hard to forgive and forget, it is possible to forgive every time I remember. 

7. Spend quality time with the Lord everyday: I have learned the hard way that going through my day without seeking God is like driving a car while blind folded. I never know what to expect and there's danger at every turn. 

8. Speak kindly to myself: This is not to be confused with being prideful. I have spent TOO much time tearing myself down, or talking about myself before somebody else can. The power of life and death lie in the tongue and I am tired of killing my own self-esteem.

9. Put things into proper perspective. Everything isn't a big deal.

10. Use the past as a map toward a better future: If we insist on looking back, then we should at least use it to make us better...

Happy 2014 and beyond! May God bless and encourage you as you strive to become the person He created you to be!

~ Shawn

Not Guilty (Pt 1)

"Through Christ, God has given us the privilege and authority as apostles to tell Gentiles everywhere what God has done for them, so that they will believe and obey Him, bringing glory to His name." Romans 1:5 (NLT)

Every year at this time, I am reminded of one of the greatest gifts God has given me since I first accepted Him into my life. Almost six years ago around Christmas time, I found myself in a spiritual rut. I was a recent college grad who was struggling through a tough course in the school of adulthood. I was officially in the "real world" and I hated everything about it. I had dreams and goals for myself, but I was so insecure and had very little faith in the direction my life was headed. To help me cope, I had begun to engage in shoplifting in order to feed my insatiable desire for "things" and control. For a while, I achieved both and if all else failed, I at least thought I had a promising future in that since I never got caught.

But one day I did get caught.

It was the most humiliating day of my life. There I was in the middle of a store being asked to empty my pockets in front of everyone, including my sisters who I knew looked up to me. I was escorted out of the store and led handcuffed through the mall to a security holding cell. The cell in which I was placed was barren and the only thing in my view was my own reflection in the glass door. My eyes caught the gaze of a person I didn't recognize staring back at me through that glass. Who is this person? How in the heck did I get so low? My thoughts ran rampant until an officer came in and blew my mind with one simple comment.  "You work for NBC. There was no reason for you to do this."

At first, I had no clue what he was talking about or how he knew where I worked. I thought that perhaps they ran a search on me and found the information, but then I noticed something that explained everything. I had totally forgotten about the jacket I was wearing, which bore the company's famous peacock logo on the sleeve. As I was doing my deed in the mall,  I had forgotten that I was also acting as a representative of a well-respected media giant at the same time. Somehow, I was tarnishing the reputation of what it meant to be a part of that organization. You know how stereotypes go. People with good jobs don't steal. Shoplifters are usually poor and uneducated. Well so much for that stereotype...

I had a completely different message for this blog post before I started writing it, but God has literally interrupted that train of thought to share something with me that I need to share with anyone who reads this. Many times as Christians, we go through life doing whatever pleases us, forgetting the responsibility that we carry. The "logo on our sleeve," if you will. Unbelievers look at our behavior and question our faith because sometimes our behavior is "worse" than theirs. I have heard that too many times to ignore. We tarnish the reputation of the One we represent whenever we act on our own will and desires. It's time to take this walk seriously and be the ambassadors God has called us to be, according to the Word of God. As one of my good friends always says, "Preach the Gospel and when necessary, open your mouth." Let's allow our lives to be the example of Christ's love. We have to be mindful of our actions. The world is watching.

Not Guilty (Pt. 2)

"For I am the least of the apostles, who am not worthy to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am..." I Corinthians15:9-10 (NKJV)

Fast forward from the  prison cell to the months after my arrest...It was time for my court hearing that would determine my fate and ultimately shape the direction of my future. The four grueling weeks leading to that day will always be etched in my mind. Probably God's way of keeping me humble. Everyday, I got up at 5AM and prayed for God's forgiveness as soon as I opened my eyes. I asked for a second chance as I got dressed for work. I prayed again as I boarded the bus to work, and as I walked to the building. I fasted. And I prayed some more. Every. Day. I tried to smile to hide the guilt, fear and anxiety that was eating me alive, but I failed miserably. Although I prayed to an all-powerful God, I doubted that He would forgive me this time. I knowingly made the wrong choices. I spat in His face every time I chose to disobey Him. I didn't even bother to pray about it until after I got into trouble. I figured I was probably wasting my time praying the way that I did. But I literally had nowhere else to go. I had to trust Him. Eventually, the day finally came.

In court, I had to sit for almost two hours and watched more than a dozen other offenders receive harsh punishments for their crimes. The experience was excruciating. By the time the judge called my name, I was bracing myself for the worst. My dreams of a great career in the government were over. My reputation and ability to lead others was finished. Finally, the judge issued his ruling...What?!? Not guilty?? I'm free?? Am I hearing correctly? This time, I wanted to shout. Cry. Run. Anything that would help me express the elation I was feeling...

In spite of everything, God forgave me. Wiped my slate clean. Gave me a fresh start with a new sense of gratitude that I never had before. I am embarrassed to admit that he also confirmed His existence. There were times that I questioned if He was even real. Yet, He did all of this and more for me because He loves me. In fact, He loves us. More than 2,000 years ago, God knew that we couldn't overcome the guilt of our sins on our own, so He sent His only Son, who NEVER did anything wrong, as a sacrifice to wipe each of our slates clean for good. Because of that sacrifice, I was able to come to my Father and be forgiven. The thing that blows my mind the most is that there were many people in that courtroom who did the same thing I had done. But I was literally the only one to walk away with a clean slate. To God be the glory...

God examined my heart and saw my desire to turn away from the sin that got me in that situation in the first place. If it had not been for God's grace at that moment, I wouldn't be sitting here writing this blog trying to encourage readers to accept the freedom that God has promised each of us through Jesus Christ. I would literally have nothing to say right now. Today, I implore you not to wait until trouble comes to go looking for God. He wants you to come today. No matter where you are in life, no matter what you did 5 minutes ago...Another chance at life is available. Please accept Christ into your life and let his Spirit help you navigate through this difficult journey. Just like me, your story doesn't have to end with what you did wrong. It's time to accept the invitation and walk in the abundant life that God has richly promised all of those who love Him.